Apple’s latest tear-jerking holiday commercial asks you to ‘open your heart’ to monsters

Is Apple indirectly acknowledging the grotesque nature of the first ever iPhone without a headphone jack in tow, pleading for holiday shoppers to look beneath the surface? Probably not, and Tim Cook would not take kindly to the 2-in-1 iPad Pro tablet line being likened to Frankenstein’s monster either.

To be perfectly frank (pun intended), we’re not sure exactly what Frankie, aka Mary Shelley’s literary creature, has to do with iDevices. Or the heartwarming holiday season. But often, when it comes to publicity stunts not involving silly celebrity cameos, Cupertino will try to randomly link a generic social message, corny music and/or cheesy short story to its always popular gadgets.

This time, the not-very-subtle “subtext” of Apple’s early Christmas commercial is “open your heart to everyone”, with gentle giant Brad Garrett of “Everybody Loves Raymond” fame playing, well, a gentle giant looking all frightening on the outside while wishing nothing more than to express his warm and fuzzy feelings inside to a non-torch-wielding mob.

It turns out a couple of strategically-placed colored light bulbs, a few clumsily-carried “Home for the Holidays” lyrics, and a courageous and helpful little girl are all a monster needs to earn social acceptance nowadays. I’m not crying, you’re crying!

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Drake returns Taylor Swift’s favor, clumsily working out to ‘Bad Blood’ in fresh Apple Music ad

Canadian rapper, singer, songwriter and record producer Drake may just be the type of dude, or rather the only dude in the history of gymgoers, that can get pumped up from listening to Taylor Swift’s 2015 pop hit “Bad Blood.”

In fact, Drake is apparently the type of dude that likes to bench press to an entire curated playlist hilariously titled “Pop Workout.” After making sure his traditional rapper entourage is out of the picture, that is, but still.

“Tay Tay’s” mad workout tunes are the perfect pretext for the meme-meister to show off an evolution of those oft-mocked “Hotline Bling” dance moves, as well as some wicked lip sync skills bound to make even Jimmy Fallon a little jealous.

Much like Drake’s own “Jumpman” #GYMFLOW headliner a while back though, Swift’s infuriatingly catchy lyrics ultimately get the best of the self-disparaging rapper, who miscalculates his strength and fitness, writhing in pain as he drops a massive barbell unto himself.

The advertising message is as simple and effective as always, with Apple Music service deemed “distractingly good” by two of the world’s hottest recording artists. But is it also distractingly or, at least, sufficiently affordable now that Amazon challenges Cupertino and Spotify’s music streaming app domination?

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Fresh iPhone 7 ‘Dive’ ad highlights stereo speakers, water resistance, ‘magic’

“Practically magic.” It’s not the greatest advertising slogan ever, but it’s definitely better than “It just works” or “The only thing that’s changed is everything.” It’s catchy, not overly misleading, and when combined with a decent storyline, as well as a relatable, likable main character, it “just works” to highlight the near-magical strengths of the iPhone 7 on TV and YouTube.

Specifically, those long overdue powerful stereo speakers, plus the new iOS handheld duo’s respectable water resistance. No, it’s probably not wise to take them with you while swimming, especially after a high-platform dive.

But a few splashes of H2O aren’t going to harm the in-demand 4.7 and 5.5-incher, or muffle the triumphant sound of Arturo Sandoval’s “La Virgen de la Macarena” trumpet piece, as you show everybody off at the local pool. Don’t hurt yourself trying something like this in real life, though. The iPhone 7’s “magic” can’t quite protect you from public humiliation or serious head injuries. Apple may try to suggest so in a future commercial, but it’s all smoke and mirrors.

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Google goes all in on Pixel advertising with $3.2 million spending in just two days

You can call it the circle of life. As BlackBerry throws in the hardware-making towel, Microsoft admits Windows Mobile defeat, HTC, Sony and Lenovo all cut back on expenses and high-profile smartphone releases, several new players arise.But we’re not just talking about China’s innumerable rising stars. Google is also somewhat unexpectedly pushing for mainstream recognition in a field where it previously had no ...

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‘Skip The Sevens’ Moto Z marketing campaign targets both Apple and Samsung

When Motorola, or just Moto, how parent company Lenovo likes to call the Android OEM these days, pointed the finger at Samsung for allegedly “stealing” its “original” Always On Display feature about a month ago, the attack came off as bitter, misguided and even a little desperate.Then, while everyone was mocking the newly unveiled iPhone 7 and 7 Plus, the Moto Z makers again took aim at the troubled Galaxy ...

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First iPhone 7 TV ad is dark, creepy, all about cameras and water resistance

Sometimes, the most memorable and effective commercials are the simplest ones. That may not entirely be the case for Apple’s first YouTube-uploaded 30-second iPhone 7 TV ad, which you’ll no doubt forget as soon as Penelope Cruz or the Cookie Monster return to plug the two trendy new iOS handhelds.Still, it’s refreshing to ...

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Microsoft’s latest anti-Apple Surface Pro 4 commercial mostly falls flat (video)

While Microsoft was arguably right to mock arch-rival Apple in a hilarious side-by-side comparison of the Surface Pro 4 and iPad Pro after the latter got billed as a “computer like no other” in a random, ill-advised advert, it didn’t take long for the jokes to get old and misfire.Sometimes, you have to know when to stop, but instead of calling it quits a couple of weeks back, Redmond quickly put together yet another ...

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Microsoft goes after MacBook Air in latest Surface Pro 4 commercial (video)

Apple’s surprising “computer like no other” iPad Pro advert from a few weeks ago seemed ill-advised off the bat on so many levels, sparking an immediate return of snarky Microsoft publicity stunts.But Redmond wasn’t content just knocking down the convertible iOS tablet’s half-baked PC functionality, now arguing its Surface line even “does more” than the most recent MacBook Air installments.And no, we’re not ...

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EE is the first UK carrier to offer Britney Spears-endorsed 6-month Apple Music freebie

Verizon may want to take a page from EE’s playbook, as its UK-leading wireless service provider counterpart doesn’t seem to know the meaning of the expression “resting on one’s laurels.”In addition to not ruining the out-the-box Galaxy Note 7 user experience, EE today inaugurates a unique Apple Music offer to keep rivals O2, Vodafone, and 3 at bay. Both new and upgrading pay monthly iOS and Android customers are treated ...

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Microsoft hits back at Apple’s PC iPad Pro claims by asking Cortana what a computer is

Microsoft’s iPad-ridiculing Surface publicity efforts are essentially as old as the 2-in-1 Windows tablet/laptop family itself, though for a little while, they ceased to frantically take jabs at the competition, turning over a new, more conventional, neutral and, honestly, boring leaf.But then out of nowhere, Apple controversially argued the iPad Pro is a full-blown computer, at which point we knew exactly what to expect. The latest Siri clone-voiced Microsoft Surface commercial has probably arrived sooner than ...

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Danny Glover unsuspensefully defuses bomb in battery-promoting Galaxy S7 ad

Hyping the Galaxy S7 series is understandably no longer the top priority of Samsung’s marketing department, which becomes clearer if you compare the names and reputations of Hollywood stars recruited to promote the company’s latest two three flagship phones.While recent double Oscar winner and main “Spectre” antagonist Christoph Waltz brings his general acting, comedic and accent A game to a highly entertaining, American-pandering Galaxy Note 7 commercial, the GS7 appears to be scraping ...

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Google Photos ad reminds iPhone users of the easiest way to free up space

Different in so many aspects, Nexus devices and iPhones have their aversion to microSD cards in common, letting digital hoarders heavily rely on cloud storage to keep said addiction in check. Both Android and iOS users can take advantage of the free allotments of services like Google Drive, Dropbox and OneDrive, or ...

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Galaxy Note 7 commercial bills the phablet as perfect for busy Americans like Christoph Waltz

With Apple’s latest “Shot on iPhone” publicity spot perfectly appealing to the soft, poetry-loving side of mobile consumers around the world, Samsung is left needing to resort to light-hearted humor, celebrity cameos and, well, weirdness in one of the first official Galaxy Note 7 ads.Luckily, that’s exactly where the Korean tech giant’s marketing department typically excels, and this American patriotism-evoking 90-second clip is no exception.At first, it may feel like Austrian – German ...

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Apple’s latest ‘Shot on iPhone’ ad features Maya Angelou reciting ‘Human Family’ poem

Not all of Apple’s TV and YouTube commercials released in recent months have been as universally praised as iPhone or iPad-promoting video efforts from previous years, some starring onions for unexplained reasons, others getting a controversial message across, while one or two simply fell flat trying too hard to be ...

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What exactly is the iPad Pro? A computer like no other, according to new Apple ad

Vaguely described as a device “powerful enough to easily take on tasks once reserved for PCs”, as well as “many you could never do on a PC” on Apple’s very own official website, the iPad Pro (in both 9.7 and 12.9-inch derivations) is widely considered to be a tablet first.It’s even counted as such in sales reports foreshadowing the extinction of the conventional ...

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